Archive for December, 2010

The Jilted Lover!

Posted in Uncategorized on December 29, 2010 by Ella Slayne

So I’m trying not to take this personally but it’s a little difficult not to feel a tad dumped! ūüė¶¬† Ella has a new blog!¬† And it’s all writery and serious – nothing like this one.¬† Apparently she wanted to distance herself from me a bit more, seeing as she has nearly finished the other book with that other girl in it, Trisha Something-or-other.

As far as I know, she’s not a bit like me…in fact at the beginning of the book she’s a¬†right party-pooper and has let herself go a bit¬†– I mean she doesn’t even get her hair done¬†until two thirds of the way through the book – honestly!¬†

¬†¬† The book’s a bit gloomy in parts…so I’ve heard…nothing like High-Heels And Slippers so…you know as heroines go, we’re completely different…which is good.¬† Yes I should hardly feel threatened…¬†and she doesn’t actually have her own blog – just a¬†page¬†so¬†she’s hardly celebrity level.¬†¬†¬†

So just to show there are no hard feelings and that I am completely ok with this, here is the link to the new blog which is called  Ella Slayne РWriter (hardly inspiring if you ask me but there we are): http://ellaslayne.wordpress.com/

No so am not threatened at all…really…but I would be a bit miffed if that Trisha book got published before mine – humph!

Bye y’all!

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From Bah Humbug to Now That’s What I Call Christmas!

Posted in blogging, fiction, humor, life, personal, Uncategorized, writing with tags , , , , , , on December 20, 2010 by Ella Slayne

To be honest this was going to be a bit of a anti-Christmas rant!  It was going to be about how sick I was of hearing horrendous Christmas music blaring form every corner of the shopping centers РI mean honestly how many versions of Deck The Halls and White Christmas are there? 

And about how annoying it was that every shop and doctor’s office reeked of cinnamon and spice air freshener – to the point that I began to¬†wonder if my¬†nasal hairs were being¬†compromised. ¬†

And how I everytime I drove around the neighborhood, I feared for the future of our planet because of the outrageous amount of Christmas lights which adorn every yard.

Yes it is probably true to say that I was not really in the Christmas spirit.

Until yesterday that is – when¬†I was invited to a Christmas party and had the excuse to don a little black dress, ¬†red liptstick and socialize.¬†¬† It’s amazing what having a few cocktails and canapes with friends can do to lift one’s spirits.¬† Not to mention a pair of classy high-heels and spirtz of perfume!

Merry Christmas y’all and as the wise Mr Lennon once said “Let’s hope it’s a good one!”

Designing Death Masks

Posted in blogging, fiction, humor, life, personal, Uncategorized, writing with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on December 9, 2010 by Ella Slayne

I read an article recently on death masks and I’ve decided I want one.¬†¬†¬†I mean, what a perfect way to stay immortal and make sure that you’re nearest and dearest don’t forget you?¬†¬†

Except¬†I’m not going to wait until I’m dead, because chances are that at that stage in the game I will not be in my prime –¬†I mean after all I’ll be dead – it’s hardly one’s best look is it?¬†¬† No.¬†¬†So I’m thinking about having one made now, while I’m young (relatively) and I’m going to smile so that I look cheery because who wants to be the kill-joy in the corner of the room huh?¬† I mean you don’t want all the rellies¬†to say “Oh look there’s Aunty So-and-So, she¬†was a right grump?” And then what if, in like say a hundred years from now, they take your death mask to Antiques Roadshow and the expert says “Oh yes this is an old death mask worth a bob or two, shame she’s such an ugly old trout!”¬† On National Television – mortifying!¬†

So¬†I’m thinking that one’s death mask’s value would be greatly increased with a smile.¬†

Oh and I may ask the artist or sculptor¬† – or whatever you call the people who make death masks (apart from weirdos obviously because¬†lets face it, it is a bit strange to make a living taking casts of dead people) – to plump my lips up a bit and¬†perhaps just iron out the wrinkle¬†on the top of my forehead.¬†¬†And actually if they could just¬†¬†make me look a bit more like Nicole Kidman that would go down well… it wouldn’t take much really… even out my chin a bit … and maybe lift the eyes a tad….Now where’s the Yellow Pages?

Ah. There doesn’t appear to be a section for Death Mask…what a pity.

¬†Bye y’all!