Archive for September, 2010

Poet’s Corner – oh I say – is Josie Jenkins getting a bit intellectual?

Posted in blogging, fiction, humor, life, personal, Uncategorized, writing with tags , , on September 20, 2010 by Ella Slayne

I am not usually a literary nut but while flicking through a book of poetry by  Dorothy Parker  –  as you do, daaaarling! – I came across this, which I found to be wonderfully short and to the point!

News Item

Men seldom make passes

At girls who wear glasses.

Dorothy Parker

You said it Dorothy – thank goodness for contact lenses!  😉

Bye y’all!

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Quick Tip No.5!

Posted in blogging, fiction, humor, life, personal, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , on September 17, 2010 by Ella Slayne

Never underestimate the value of a good bra fitting!  

Seriously – it’s so worth the money  – and the embarrassment as you stand opposite a three way mirror with Miss Over-Smiley-and-Ever-So-Young shop assistant, staring at your scantily clad torso as she shoves her fingers down the back of the bra strap and tells you “Ooh this is a lovely fit madam”  – aargh!  

You know I’m right ladies!

Bye y’all!

Thinking About Shorts! (Actually it’s become a bit of an obsession…)

Posted in blogging, fiction, humor, life, personal, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , on September 8, 2010 by Ella Slayne

Who on earth invented shorts?  If you think about them long enough they are just silly aren’t they?  It’s like when you say a word over and over again, it starts to sound bizarre, same with a pair of shorts, if you stare at them long enough they strike you as the oddest piece of clothing.  

I suppose they were born out of necessity, I mean I get it, you know, it’s stifling hot outside, you have to get around without sweating yourself into a faint, so it makes sense to expose some of the leg area.  But really and truly, they are the most challenging of garments and quite frankly should be off-limits to a lot of people (including myself).  Because let’s be honest about this, very few people actually look good in shorts…it’s one of those facts you have to face when staring at yourself in the changing room mirror.   Unless you happen to be  long-legged and super toned  – I’m sure those body-types look good in shorts … but then thinking about it, even they should avoid wearing shorts because  it makes the rest of us look bad. 

For years I completely avoided them – plumping for the cropped trouser instead…or a swishy skirt, on my more bohemian days.  But eventually the incessant heat in Texas got too much for me and I had to succumb – eek!  What a nightmare trying on various different pairs of shorts and watching how my wobbly thighs balked at their sudden exposure!

In the end I went for a pair from Gap mainly because they were called Boyfriend shorts and I liked the name, but also because I could do up the waistband on a size ten, which is always a bonus!  They’re  dark grey which I like to think gives me a bit an urban New Yorker look when teamed with a black t-shirt (well a girl’s gotta dream huh?). 

The drawbacks or opting to wear shorts, apart from the chance of being laughed and pointed at in the street of course, are maintaining the removal of leg hair – always a drag – much easier to get away with a bit of leg stubble in crops!   But the  benefits are that my entire legs have gone a lovely golden brown colour, not just my ankles! And they have this wonderful way of bagging out during the day, which makes me feel as if I have suddenly lost ten pounds on the Jenny Craig diet! 

Although I suspect all that bagging makes my bum look like a bag of potatoes – still, my bottom is, thankfully, behind me, so who cares?

Bye y’all!